In serious need of motivation

So I have my first run of the season in a week and I can't for the life of me get myself to put on my running shoes when I get home from work. I wake too early and commute for an hour. I'm sure I'm going to really hate myself when it comes.

I also put back on the 5 pounds I've fought so much to lose. This is getting exhausting.

Put back on all the weight I just lost. So here’s to a three-day detox. I have a whole bunch of shakeology around the house that I've always had a hard time bringing myself to drink daily.  So I'll put it to use and maybe get myself back on track. We shall see how it goes.

CIGNA Fitness headSMART

Week 1 day 3 

Breakfast check in

Saturday, What did I eat?

Week 1 day 4 

Breakfast check in

Sunday I didn’t eat breakfast except a banana.

Week 1 day 5  Monday

Are digestives healthy? These are some delicious biscuits I get from the UK. They are great dipped in tea or coffee. Low sugar and high in fiber. Not bad. 

Sipped on water during my commute. I need to have breakfast ready for mornings. This is always easier said than done.

Anti-diet week 1 day who cares

Overcoming obstacles

Set a concrete plan to overcome obstacles.

I shouldn’t have started so many of these programs at once. I stopped several of them and got down to only 2.

CIGNA Fitness headSMART Week 1 Day 1

My Galaxy S7 suggested this Cigna app in the SHealth app. My health insurance is through Cigna so I figured why not, it's free. It has you take a quiz and it gives you suggestions on programs. The second program I'm going to start is called Fitness headSMART.

What’s your motivation? To feel epic in my bikini on our vacation

What are your goals for this program? To loose weight.

What has gotten in your way before? Time and energy.

Who can you rely on to support you? My boyfriend.

Cigna Health Anti-Diet Week 1 Day2

My Galaxy S7 suggested this Cigna app in the SHealth app. My health insurance is through Cigna so I figured why not, it's free. It has you take a quiz and it gives you suggestions on programs. The first program I'm going to work through is called the Anti-diet. 

Day 2

Flip your mindset

Take note of any negativity today and remind yourself that you deserve to be treated with kindness.

Love yourself

Make a list of qualities you love about yourself.

I like that I’m knowledgeable. I know a lot of random facts and figures. It sometimes drives people crazy. I always want to learn and try things so I guess that helps make life interesting for me. I have naturally thick hair that gets natural highlights in the sun. I have yet to see grays. I am not fat or overly thin. I have curves. 

Cigna Health Anti-Diet Week 1 Day1

My Galaxy S7 suggested this Cigna app in the SHealth app. My health insurance is through Cigna so I figured why not, it's free. It has you take a quiz and it gives you suggestions. The first program I'm going to work through is called the Anti-diet. 

Day 1 List 5 to 10 feelings associated with dieting.

I mean I know I never liked to call what I was doing dieting but it’s what I’ve done many times. Anytime it was brought up I’d shun the crazy things women in the office were doing to lose weight. I knew it wouldn’t do anything. You don’t deserve ice cream for walking more than what you did yesterday and that salad with all those toppings and heavy dressings are just making you depressed. I was vegetarian for a while. It was a nice way to save money as meats expensive and it also gave me nice skin. I even went vegan for 2 weeks but I love cheese and eggs too much. My boyfriend did that one with me and he said it made him realize how important veggies were. All those diets are limiting. You have to avoid foods. After awhile you avoid people too. You just don't want to talk about it with other people. 

My words associated with dieting:

Buzzwords

Vegetarian – meat free

Gluten free

Vegan – meat and dairy free

Limiting

Avoid

High Heel shoes

I used to dislike the girls at work who wore high heels. I own a lot of pairs but I only ever wear them to parties or holidays. I've come to decide that they just made me uncomfortable (the girls not the shoes). I never thought I could be that type of women whatever that meant. Today I wore my most comfortable heels for the sole purpose that my pants are long, I'm short and it is raining. I've noticed that where I'm normally ignored by passersby, which suits me fine I'm rather shy, that hasn't been the case today. I even had a guy do a double take. It could be I'm holding myself different. I had a theatre coach tell me that in the halls she'd see me and my body language was withdrawn. In heels, you have to hold yourself up taller or you'll fall over. This would give your body a much more open, less withdrawn, appearance. Maybe I need to walk a mile in someone else's shoes before I judge them?

Jamberry Nails

Alright, I've finally come to a decision. I am not a fan of Jamberry nails. I'm kind of said about this. They seemed like a cool idea with all the neat designs. I'm very picky about my nails. My nails, when I take care of myself, are naturally french tipped without much effort. My old roommates used to hate me for just putting clear nail polish on when they dropped a lot of money on fake nails. Luckily my best friend loves them so she can have them. Win!